Dirty Rags, a New Year's contemplation

For all of us have become like one who is unclean, and all our righteous deeds are like a filthy garment (rag in the NIV). Isaiah 64: 6

This is the end of the year...a time to reflect on the past year's activities, goals, and events...planned and unplanned, joyous and tearful. There are a couple of things that I can reflect on as I get older.

1. How much I have changed over time...usually for the better (pity the people who knew me when I was younger...sigh). This is because God has opened my eyes and heart to things that I used to defend that really needed to be changed...usually by seeing those things in the lives of others and being offended by them myself...and going,” Is that how people see me? Forgive me, Lord! Help me to change! That doesn't glorify you or edify others!”
2. How much God loves me and puts up with me, my family, the world in general...and how gracious He is to point me to the people and resources we need to learn what He wants us to learn.
3. How little what I do counts for the kingdom.

And #3 is where this verse hits home. Being unclean back in the days of Isaiah wasn't just coming home from a long day in the fields hot and sweaty. It was being in the condition of not being able to go to the temple to worship. There were all sorts of provisions that could keep you away from church, and not many were things you could do much about. But suffice it to say that you were not acceptable at that time and could not come into the presence of God. The verses before these tell the tale of the whole of Israel sinning to the point where God was just angry with them...they did not confess and repent, but continued in the sin. They were unworthy to come to His temple and offer the sacrifices that were required. Well, you say, if they were required and the people showed up with them anyway, wasn't God happy that they at least did it? And the answer is NO! The whole book of Isaiah starts with God telling them to stay home...keep your cattle and livestock offerings because they are not going to make any difference because you have no intention of living for Me, in Me, or with Me. The whole thing stinks like your work clothes, like your cleaning rag or menstral cloth...yuck-o.

So what's a Christian to do? In all of the watching of Ebenezer Scrooge this time of year, are we to have a change of heart? To start doing good to those around us because the ghosts are haunting us, showing us who we have been, who we are, and who we might become? Well, sort of, but not quite. There are plenty of ghosts in my life. I look back and see, like Ebenezer, how selfish, greedy, unkind, and rude I have been not only in the way back past, but even yesterday. I reflect on what I have done, what I have given, and see how little it has really accomplished. We all reach the point as we grow older where we realize that life is not all we thought it would be, that we have not achieved the goals we had, that at the great judgment day to come that a lot of life will be the wood, hay, and stubble and precious little of it will be the gold, silver, and precious stones as in 1 Corinthians 3. Isaiah 64: 11 says that all of our precious things will become ruin. We work so hard for them...and as they say, it's all going to burn.

So, every righteous thing I do is like rags...great. Why bother? Because His righteousness is worth it. He is the one who cleans us up...who makes us worthy to walk with Him and work for Him. We were created FOR GOOD WORKS which HE PREPARED for us to do. Ephesians 2:10. We are HIS WORKMANSHIP, saved by faith that didn't even come from us...but through HIM as a gift to us, plucking us out of our sinful state for His usage. I think I have in the past compared this to picking a few bolts off the shelves at the store...out of all the fabrics there, we don't take all of them to make our masterpiece...but we select a few that are willing and able to be used with the pattern that He has chosen. Big, bold prints will not work in some patterns because chopping them up will change their appearance. Grayed, muted tones often will not work with brights unless they are cut very small. We were gifted to be used, to create something warm and beautiful, useful and a reflection of the creator. We as the fabric (in this passage we are called clay, but you get my drift) do not get to pick the pattern or any other part of the process. We have the unnecessary parts cut and are sliced into pieces that are strategically dispersed throughout the top. We are joined with other pieces, often through the painful process of being pricked, layered with the part that holds in the warmth, and backed with the support that holds all of this together. Then we are pricked through again and again to hold all of this together. Maybe more trimming is necessary, and then the edges are bound to hold the whole of life together and keep it from wearing away. Then the whole is useful and fulfilling to the Maker. The fabric was part of the design and ended up where it belonged, but had no idea what the Maker was going to do with it. It was chosen, shaped, used, and loved at the end.

This is the story of our lives. We don't know what we shall become in the new year...happier, sadder, wiser, grumpier, healthier or weaker...but I trust the Designer knows what He is doing and will cut, pierce, trim, and join me to others in accordance to His will. Maybe a part of me will end up a dust cloth and discarded, but I trust that the parts He puts into the quilt will bring Him pleasure and someone warmth. And in that, the year can start with HOPE. My hope is not in me, but in the designer, maker, and quilter of my soul...and in that truth I can rest my fretting mind as well. Happy New Year!