Thursday, March 27, 2014

Changing from our mourning clothes

So David said to his servants, “Is the child dead?” And they said, “He is dead.” So David arose from the ground, washed, anointed himself, and changed his clothes; and he came into the the house of the Lord and worshiped. 2 Samuel 12:19b-20A.

Tears come to my eyes whenever I read or hear this passage. It is the story of human tragedy. David and Bathsheba lose the child they have born because of the sins of adultery and murder. This passage was read yesterday morning by David Jeremiah in his sermon on heaven, and children going there. It is a blessing, really, to know that God has mercy on that child...but it is also heart-rending to know that God LOVED David, and still took severe measures to sanctify him. This was not the only time people died for David's sin. The census cost them thousands of people. Going to the temple for refuge cost the priests their lives (though that one was not a sin). His sons killed many, including each other, because he didn't see the problems they had or deal with them. We are sinners, and the woes of this world are brought on by the hundreds of sins we all perform, think, or contemplate daily times 6 billion. Sin is an awful thing, and we truly in our heart of hearts wish God would just overlook it. We do a David. When we recognize it when confronted by our Nathans, we get mad, then get sad, and then fear for our lives or the lives of those we love. Am I an unusual parent? Does anyone else out their watch their children (small or grown) sin and wonder just how much we contributed to it? Are they suffering because I set a bad example? Is God taking His wrath out on me or them by letting us fall flat on our faces? Was there a sin I could have confessed, a prayer I could have prayed, a fast I could have taken, that would have removed the consequences of our sin? Our brokenness makes us vulnerable to the attacks of Satan. We really don't know sometimes what we suffer because of our own sin, the sin of others, or the love or righteousness of God. We can torture ourselves over these things. Sometimes it is plain...as in this instance with David.

David fasted for a week, laid on the ground, and pleaded with God for the child. His servants begged him to get up, to eat, to wash, to do SOMETHING other than lay there. They thought he was suicidal! But he knew his sin, and he knew he deserved it, but he didn't want the consequences to be placed on the baby. And for all practical purposes, though the baby died, he came out best in this whole scenario. Unlike his brothers, he would never sin, not be slain by his brothers, not hate of his father or turn against God to idols. But we grieve for that child. Innocent himself, but the result of much guilt. How do we handle these things?

We pray. We weep. We fast. We mourn.

And we trust God.

SAY WHAT?

David knew that God was God. It is a hard place for us to be, and we fight that with all our humanness. We think God has made some sort of mistake when trials come, when consequences mount, and results of our sin come in. There have been instances with each of my children where I marvel at God's goodness one minute and wonder if He will smite them the next. When I finally learned that my sin was wretched enough as it was, the sins of my children seemed to compound it, to multiply the awfulness of it. I didn't want them to lie, cheat, steal, drink, party, or abandon the God who loves them. But at some point these things have happened...some when they were young and dumb, and some when they were willful and rebellious, or reacting to the sinfulness of their parents. Sometimes they have repented, and sometimes they have continued on, but God knows what He wants to work in their lives. When I wonder what is taking so long for people to turn from their sin, I only need to look at my own heart, and the answer is obvious...we don't see it for what it is. We justify, we make excuses and blame, we tell God He expects too much. We let Satan whisper sweet nothings in our ear and are drawn away from the one who will cleanse us, open our eyes and hearts, and give us more joy than we can hold, if only we didn't fight Him.

David knew and trusted God. He changed his clothes from mourning and pleading to those of worship, even in the case of death. Maybe God would change His mind, he thought. And when He didn't, he worshiped, knowing that God was right in His judgments. He got on with life, humbled, corrected, and in awe of the God who loved him. He entrusted that babe into the arms of a loving, but just, God.


And so must we. We plead for our kids, our churches, our world because we see the consequences of sin in each of them. We should never stop pleading, but when the end comes and no more can be done, we put ourselves and those we love into the hand of the merciful Savior. It's our human place for now. But NOT forever. And for that we can also be ETERNALLY GRATEFUL! As David knew, “I will go to him (the child), but he will not return to me.” The end will be good, though the pain is real for now.

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